Dear Abby: Our last name sounds like a dirty word, so did my son do the wrong thing?

Greetings, Abby

Next year, our son Caleb and his fiancée Lucy will tie the knot. She’s 24 and he’s 26. Our last name is uncommon, and when mispronounced—which it frequently is—it sounds like a nasty word. Following their wedding, Caleb has made the decision to formally adopt Lucy’s last name after giving it careful consideration. (She is on board with her family.) He was telling us about his goals, not requesting my or his father’s approval.

We only have one son, Caleb. We have a daughter as well. Although I agree with my son’s choice, his father does not. They have stopped talking. The idea of future grandchildren using a different family name also irritates my spouse. Do you know any males who have adopted their wives’ last names, Abby? DESIRES A QUIET FAMILY

DEAR DESIRES PEACE:

Even if you may desire peace, you are not responsible for finding a solution. Although it may be uncommon, changing one’s name for the reason your kid mentioned is not unheard of. As one previous Los Angeles mayor did, some couples choose to combine their names. Even if your husband might be unhappy with your son’s choice, he has no say in the matter.

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Abigail Van Buren, better known as Jeanne Phillips, is the author of Dear Abby. Her mother, Pauline Phillips, began the company. Get in touch with Dear Abby via P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069, or at www.DearAbby.com.

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