Dear Abby: Does a drug-induced marriage proposal count?

jhon

Greetings, Abby

I’ve been with my partner, Chad, for ten years. Despite not having children together, we have been each other’s stepparents since the start of our relationship. We have had to cope with his unrelenting ex-wife, who has had several relationships, ever since we started dating. In addition, we had to deal with my ex-husband leaving the state and being separated from our kid.

Dealing with children and ex-partners has, to put it mildly, caused us to neglect ourselves. In addition, Chad, my daughter, and I all had surgery due to health issues. Only once, as he was recovering from anesthesia in the recovery room, and again shortly after we returned home from another surgery, did he ask me to marry him.

Is it incorrect of me to disregard the post-surgery recommendations? We just became grandparents, and I don’t want to disappoint him by declining. I think I need a proposal that is crystal clear. WANTS IT IN UTAH FOR REAL

DEAR WANTS IT:

You and Chad have been involved in this relationship for ten years. whether you want to marry him, ask him whether he remembers making the proposal, which he has done twice previously. Inform him that you might be amenable to a proposal if he asked in the daylight, but that you could not honestly hold him to one that was made while he was under the effects of anesthetic or painkillers. Next, cross your fingers.

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Abigail Van Buren, better known as Jeanne Phillips, is the author of Dear Abby. Her mother, Pauline Phillips, began the company. Get in touch with Dear Abby via P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069, or at www.DearAbby.com.

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