Dear Abby: My dating app matches are either too clingy or distant

jhon

Greetings, Abby

I’m a gay man of 22 who has tried dating apps without success. One of the guys was ten years my senior, a former Air Force member, and incredibly needy during the initial hours of texting. He claimed to be incredibly in love with me and to want to spend the rest of his life with me.

I tried talking to other guys, but none of them ever made an effort to continue the discussion. I am at a loss on what to do. When I brought this up to a few friends and coworkers, they advised me to limit my search to males of my race. Race doesn’t matter to me. Regardless of color, I have witnessed a lot of males abuse their partners.

The qualities that make someone pleasant to be around are important to me. What pastimes do they have? What path do they hope to pursue in their career? What are their methods in the kitchen? Do they maintain order? I also don’t like going to parties, drinking, or having casual sex.

Although there aren’t many LGBTQ communities where I am right now, I would really love to find a gentleman for myself. I think I’ll be by myself for longer than I had anticipated. Having a particular someone would be lovely, but I’m trying to concentrate on my work and studies. Any suggestions? NOT SUCCESSFUL IN NORTH CAROLINA

Greetings, failing:

Verify that you are not utilizing dating apps designed for hookups. Seek for those who are relationship-oriented instead. They’re out there. In order to meet new individuals who share your interests, you should also make it a priority to attend the LGBTQ community center in the closest big city. You might make some lifelong friends, but I can’t promise you’ll find love.

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Abigail Van Buren, better known as Jeanne Phillips, is the author of Dear Abby. Her mother, Pauline Phillips, began the company. For more information, visit www.DearAbby.com or send an email to P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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Order How to Be Popular for a great manual on how to become a more gregarious and better conversationalist. Please send a check or money order for $8 (U.S. cash) to Dear Abby, Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447, along with your name and mailing address. (The price includes shipping and handling.)

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